Football Season Is The Perfect Time To Get Fat

Here comes another football season.  Can’t wait to see how much weight I gain during this season.  This time of year is very challenging to me.

I get together with friends and family every Sunday during football season.  I actually go to some games at all levels of the sport.  I have friends who have children playing Pop Warner football.  I like to attend some of my high school alma mater games and relive the glory years.  I go to some college games and even some professional games.  I love football.

Along with all those football games comes heavy consumption of beer and junk food.  I know I am not supposed to have that stuff if I want to lose weight.  I just can’t stand depriving myself of it.  I have tried.   Have tried to go over to a relatives where everyone else is drinking and eating whatever they want during the game.  They sit there and stuff their faces as I try to pretend I don’t see them doing it.  It is pure torture for which I am too weak.

I always give in.  I just can’t stand to be around it and not participate in it.  I guess it really is an addiction.  I tell myself that I’ll just have one piece of pizza.  Then I end up eating four.  I tell myself I’ll only drink 4 light beers all day.  By the end of the day I end up counting ten.  I am too weak to be around this stuff and I know one day I am going to pay for all this fun and gluttony many times over.

It is just a damn shame that some people can eat and drink like that without getting more than twenty pounds overweight.  I wish I was one of them.  I wish I could say the same, but I can’t.  I gain weight faster than anyone I know.  I can literally gain pounds in one day.  Honest to God.

If I wanted to, I could easily put ten pounds on in two days from eating.  All you have to do is put me in a good steakhouse with thick cuts of prime rib, huge lobsters and a few bottles of California cabernet.  I will show you how to gain weight.  I always thought it was funny how some guys say they want to gain weight.  Watch and learn son.  It comes really easy for me.

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